Elizabeth Carson here willing to pump your petrol through the nozzle. "How much, Sir?" she asks compliantly, knowing how to please.

I have always been drawn to submissive women. Even before I could put a name to what I was, or recognised fully what I am, I always had partners that were, to some extent or other, submissive. It was what I needed. I see my relationships as partnerships. I cannot be a Dominant without a submissive. I need a submissive to really be what I need to be, to realize my potential (though that probably sounds corny).

My sexual fantasies regarding partners have almost always included the idea that I was in control. My fantasies often involved my partners being naked, but they hardly ever involved actual sex. It was the idea of the control, and maybe the surrender, that I fantasised about, and it was this that always turned me on.

A couple of the key words in my life and my relationships are: trust, caring and respect. Without these any relationship, be it friendship or more, is hollow and without significance. A real delight for me is to have a bright, intelligent and confident woman give herself to me, surrender herself completely to me, based on the trust that I have earned from her. It is an honour and makes me feel so warm inside. This is beautiful.

By nature I am very caring and nurturing. For me, important things when caring about a submissive partner are making sure that she feels that:
1. she is being used and appreciated and,
2. she is respected for what she is and how she behaves for me.

Speaking of which, we note that Chelsea has been spending considerable time in Britain, where they are well more advanced than those in Westchester County, NY in the realm of edgy, trendy, and urban tribalist body decor.



Hope she got through the metal detector at Heathrow without having to show her tits.
-----------------------------

There he goes again.... being hilareous!
Amish Tech Support Am I nuts, or...

When I read about this civil war going on in the Ivory Coast, I can't help but want to call it "The Soap War." I mean, think about it... you've got Ivory... you've got Coast. I see lots of opportunities for product placement while these people kill each other by the thousands.

At least with Ivory and Coast, it can be a good clean fight.
[ back to top ] - [ 16:42 ] - [ 5 comments ]

Subject: A wise old man

An old farmer had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back forty, had it fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, basketball court, etc. The pond was fixed for swimming when it was built.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end of the pond. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"

The old man replied, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim or make you get out of the pond, I only came to feed my alligators."

Old age & treachery will triumph over youth & skill every time!

Time For Your Meds
Jewish English
NEW YORK, February 1 - The New York City school board has officially declared Jewish English - now dubbed Hebonics - as a second language. Backers of the move say the city's School District is the first in the state to recognize Hebonics as a valid language and significant attribute of New York culture.

According to Howard Schollman, linguistics professor at New York University and renowned Hebonics scholar, the sentence structure of Hebonics derives from middle and eastern European language patterns, as well as Yiddish.

Prof. Schollman explains, "In Hebonics, the response to any question is usually another question-plus a complaint that is implied or stated. Thus 'How are you?' may be answered, 'How should I be, with my feet?'"
. . .

Tina the Troubled Teenager | The Brunching Shuttlecocks Never being ones to shy away from heartless mockery, we're providing you with an alternative to the feel-good world of virtual kitties and doggies and cute little cows. You want an adoption experience, see if you can handle Tina the Troubled Teen.

Aduchrome- Erotic Stories and Pictures Claire reached out and caressed Marie’s face and murmured little thank you’s as she nursed the older woman. Quietly Marie got to her feet and stood before her still seated partner. Now it was Marie’s turn to remove her clothing. She silently unbuttoned her jacket, and Claire could see that beneath all that material was a very very large chest. The thin silk blouse was strained to it’s limits as she shrugged the coat from her shoulders. You could clearly see the outline of a very sexy low cut white bra through the thin material. Slowly Marie undid the buttons of her blouse exposing one of the most beautiful chests Claire had ever seen. As if drawn by a magnet, Claire reached up and felt the huge bust as it fought to free itself from the straining nylon. As she caressed the her boobs, Marie continued to undress, slipping out of her skirt and standing before Claire in a bra, panties, garter belt and hose. She was certainly a living advertisement for BOUDOIR LINGERIE!!! Marie stood motionless for a few seconds, letting Claire get a good look at her magnificent body, and Claire noticed a very definite wet spot on the front of Marie’s frilly panties. With both hands Marie grabbed at the waistband of her panties and gave them a quick hard pull. They tore away and left Claire staring directly. . .

Sir Stephen's Confession
If my solicitor has released this transcript then you may be assured that ten
years have past since the last of those mentioned herein have past beyond the
reach of mortal justice.
I thought Rene a fool when he presented O to me. I thought him weak and
cowardly. I learned. O was my possession for but three and a half years. I
possessed her completely; and yet she could not be called my slave or even a
servant. She was always free to leave me. In truth she worshipped me in that
most ancient characterization of the word. She sought only to become a worthy
vessel for my desires. To that end she granted me her body, heart, mind, and
soul all in the hopes that I would find her worthyÂ… perchance to love her.
I did love her of course. How could I not love one who gave them self so
completely and freely? In the beginning I foolishly thought this would be
enough. Yet nothing ever remains constant and as O became accustom to my
peculiarities and demands, her own requirements to demonstrate her worthiness
grew. It was during our first year together that I had a premonition of how it
would end. She had been the focal point of a small gathering of friends,
presented naked but for a bird mask and a leash attached to the rings that
adorned her nether lips. Afterward I used her before those gathered, taking her
bottom, as was my wont. As I pulled away from her, spent, she whispered, in a
voice so soft she could not know I heard; " I would die for you". I responded
unthinkingly "of course."
I will always regret that I did not respond more forcefully. Had I not been so
charmed by the sentiment I would have had her flogged on the spot for daring to
think she could escape me in such a manner. Still, I believe I realized her
desire long before she did. In truth she was becoming somewhat despondent about
our relation. While she never would admit it, she desired to become a more
central aspect of my life, and that I could not allow. Some months later when
she repeated the thought loudly before others I did in fact have her whipped and
told her in no uncertain terms that she would live for me but never again think
of dying to express her love. When it happened again I returned her to the
chateau at Roissy and did not see her for several months.

UPS Men Deliver
More Than Packages By Robert Frank from The Wall Street Journal
People at Nike got a bit suspicious when professional runner Lynn Jennings started ordering new sneakers every week, always asking that they be sent UPS.

As it turns out, it wasn't the shoes she really wanted. It was Dave Hill, her UPS man.

"He looked like Kevin Costner in brown," she sighs, recalling their long talks on the doorstep.

Four years -- and hundreds of packages -- later, Dave and Lynn are husband and wife.

"I'm the woman who finally ran away with the UPS man," she says.

Not that others haven't tried. UPS men -- the humble couriers in tight brown polyester uniforms driving clunky package trucks -- have become sex objects of the service world.

Brown-collar fantasies have spilled over into books, plays, television shows and rock songs. In the movie "Boys on the Side," Drew Barrymore's character remarks on the sex appeal of men in uniforms -- "especially UPS uniforms." A tune called "Drive by Love," performed by the Bobs, a California pop group, describes a romance between a UPS driver and Fotomat clerk and has this refrain: "I can't get that driver out of my head. He honks his horn and my face turns red."

Library Science Jeopardy

BBC NEWS || Blue lights baffle Gulf state drivers In the capital of the United Arab Emirates (UAE), Abu Dhabi, there is confusion on the roads after the local council replaced green traffic lights with blue ones.
The mix-up came after Abu Dhabi municipality received blue, rather than green, lenses from Germany.

"It causes confusion, especially at night when it becomes brighter"
taxi-driver

Red for stop, amber for anticipation and green - no, apparently it is blue for go. That is the perplexing sequence of traffic signals drivers in Abu Dhabi are facing. Many are confused as to whether to remain stationary at junctions or move off as normal.

Thanks to Amish Tech Support for this one!

toggle new window linking?
Question

How do I toggle new window linking?

Answer

Some weblog readers prefer that hyperlinks open in the same window as the blog they are reading, yet others like to launch new windows. It's the eternal dilemma: How can one please everybody? With selectable window launching you can have the best of both worlds, allowing the individual user to select what is best for him or her.

This has been a Public Service Announcement. Helping you build a better world.

During sentencing, a young lady who had been found guilty of solicitation was fined $500. When she asked where she was going to get $500, the judge replied, "Well, I guess you’ll just have to get out there and hustle."

The same judge, when confronted by a defendant in a jail jumpsuit with the pant legs rolled up (apparently a gang sign of some sort), told him, "Pull your pants down." By the way, this judge was female and a wonderful jurist; she just lost track of how things sounded sometimes.

The World's Largest Collection of Masturbation Synonyms 1. The Random Masturbation Synonym Generator
Each time you click the "Do Me" button, it automatically spurts out a new masturbation euphemism. There are over 150,000 possible phrases.

12 paintings inspired by Histoire d'O by Pauline Reage

Wonderful artwork by a lover and true friend of O, Artist Stefan, erotic Oscar finalist.

The Owl Mask

Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her
face.

"Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked.

"To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the
cream with a tissue.

"What's the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving up?"

Gloryhole
I told Carl all about my fantasy to "belong" to a pimp.
I don't know when or where this fantasy started, and I don't really care.
It is very hot for me. In this fantasy I am totally owned by this stud pimp who treats me like shit. He spanks me, force feeds me his cock, makes me rim him, and fucks me without mercy with his huge cock. He makes me whore for him and bring him all the money, and he passes me around to his friends any time they want their cock sucked. Then he spanks the hell out of me for being such a slut and makes me rim him and apologize to him.

I have to wake him up by sucking his cock, and put him to sleep by sucking his cock. He also tattoos my ass with the slogan..."Please Fuck This Whore Ass". Believe me, this fantasy turns me on so much I can just taste it. When I really get off deep into it, my hands start shaking I am so hot for it to be reality. I know it might not be all that great in reality, but when I am off the deep end in fantasy, I can almost make it real with my mind. I love it.

When I finished telling Carl about this fantasy, he started to smile. I asked him why he was smiling and he said "Because your inner self is showing. You wish this was real, don't you?"

"A national system for
concerned workers to report
suspicious activity."
Operation TIPS (Terrorism Information and Prevention System) was introduced as a program in development in January 2002. This document contains information a bout the background and purpose of the program as it has developed over the past six months, a list of the industries that will be invited to participate in the final program, specific information about the design of the reporting system, and information about existing similar systems.

The wise old Mother Superior from county Tipperary was dying.
The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable.
They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it.
Then one nun took the glass back to the kitchen.

Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey received as a gift the previous
Christmas, she opened and poured a generous amount into the warm milk.

Back at Mother Superior's bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother drank a little, then a little more.

Before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop.

The nuns asked with earnest, Please give us some wisdom before you die.

She raised herself up in bed with a pious look on her face and said, Don't sell that cow.

The Weblog Blog

Thin Line Splits Cheating, Smarts
By Dustin Goot
Although Google Answers has a policy encouraging students to use the service as a study aid rather than a substitution for original work, several cases show that students often ignore this advice.

One student in Quebec, dismayed by a response that offered only background research for a paper on religion, pleads, "Make it into an essay, not just links and quotes. I need this asap PLEASE!!! 2500 words is the minimum."

Degrade Me - Treat Me Like an Object
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For designers of reader-friendly Web sites, one of the most exciting new tags in HTML 4.0 is the